


Fighting Back

by SVUlover



Series: A Luthor and a Super [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-04
Updated: 2017-10-03
Packaged: 2019-01-08 21:12:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12262179
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SVUlover/pseuds/SVUlover
Summary: In the aftermath of the war with Daxam, Kara decides that believing she could live as Kara Danvers and Kara Zor-El was a mistake. Declaring Kara Danvers nothing more than a disguise, she cuts herself off from her friends and family. In the end, only Lena can bring Kara Danvers back.Prequel to 'Preoccupied.'





	Fighting Back

**Author's Note:**

> So, I've been re-binge-watching in anticipation of the new season, which gave me some inspiration to finish this, which had been sitting half written in my phone notes since the season 2 finale. May bear some resemblance to the promotional material for Season 3, but different because, you know...supercorp. This is in the same universe as my oneshot "Preoccupied," it's a prequel.

At first, they leave her alone. After the dust settles, the interviews calm down, and the people of National City start to pick up the pieces that Rhea had left their city in, it's quiet. To be expected, really. In the aftermath of facing what they had, to turn to the ones you loved the most was normal. Alex had Maggie, Winn had Lyra, J'onn had M'gann, and James was caught up in CatCo and Guardian stuff. 

After Supergirl had given an exclusive interview to Cat Grant live on the air, and had worked a few days straight to help National City clean up, people seemed content to let Supergirl have a moment to herself. 

And that's when Kara Danvers flies into her open window, and touches down in her apartment for the first time since it all started. It's amazingly normal, unscathed. It’s calm and quiet, painfully normal. You couldn't even tell that their world had almost crashed outside its walls.

Kara slowly strips herself of her super suit, for the first time ever leaving it just lying in a pile on the floor as she walks into her bathroom, turns on the shower, and steps in. The water is hot, but not hot enough, never hot enough. She scrubs at her skin and hair for over half an hour and yet, when she steps out of her shower she doesn't feel clean. 

Finally giving up, Kara gets out of the shower and towel dries herself before slipping on a set of yellow flannel pajamas with little dogs all over them. For thirty-six hours, Kara falls in and out of sleep, waking often from nightmares. Memories of a planet dying combine with all of the ‘what ifs.’

What if she hadn't pushed the button?

What if Rhea had won?

What if she'd lost another planet? 

The final time she wakes is right after earth explodes, just like Krypton did. After she has to watch Alex, Eliza, J'onn, Clark, Lena, Jeremiah, Maggie, Cat, Winn, and James perish. And once again, she’s the only one left. But this time, this time she really is alone. Completely, totally alone.

She wakes with a start, feeling as though she should be damp with sweat, and hears insistent knocking on the door. "Kara! Kara, it's me!" Alex is calling from the door, and breathing heavily with tears rolling down her cheeks, Kara lets her body sink back into her bed, willing her sister to go away. She shuts her eyes and sees the explosion from her nightmares, her planet dying, and the last moment she had with Mon-El. 

“Kara…” Alex is standing over her, now, because she had a key, Kara remembers.  

“I’m tired, Alex. I just want to be alone,” She murmurs.

“Of course you’re tired. You ignored all of us and helped the City for two days, after a huge battle, Kara. I just, I wanted to make sure you were actually getting sleep.”

Kara swallows, avoiding looking at her sister. She misses the bright smile that had been on Alex’s face, the way she clearly wanted to share news. Alex frowns, sinks to a crouch beside the bed. “Kara…you did the right thing,” She whispers firmly. “You saved everyone, you saved Earth.”

“Please go,” Kara whispers. “I just want to be alone. Please just give me that.”

Alex watches her for a moment, before she nods gently. “Ok…” She says softly. “But I’ll be back.”

Kara doesn’t move even after Alex leaves. For a while she just lays there, staring into nothing, but even she has to change positions once in a while. Rolling onto her back, Kara stares at the ceiling. Once upon a time, she’d lie in this bed at night and feel so accomplished. Like she’d done something. She’d taken the life her parents had given her, had hopefully done them proud. She had gone to college, gotten a job, moved out on her own. But now, now it feels like a sham.

Winn and James try before Alex gets back. They knock on her door, call out her name. But unlike Alex, they don’t have keys, and when she doesn’t answer the door, they eventually go away. The turns onto her other side, staring out the window, watching the sky slowly streak with colors of the sunset. Orange, yellow, purple…nightfall.

Somehow, her cousin could have it all. Kal-El had found a way to balance it, the lives of Clark Kent, and Superman. He had found a balance between the two, was able to be both. Maybe it was easier for him because he’d grown up here, on Earth. But Krypton was too engrained in her. Her mission had been void when she arrived—protect Kal-El. He hadn’t needed protection, and he had dumped her with a human family. To give her the same, normal upbringing he’d had. 

But it had backfired on him. She wasn’t normal. She hadn’t arrived here as an infant, fully impressionable. She’d been thirteen years old, with memories and customs and the pain of a whole different planet. An outcast. She’d had to make herself fit in. But it hadn’t worked. She’d embraced the powers being a daughter of Krypton gave her, and had struggled to find a balance ever since. For Clark, it had been opposite. He grew up normal, had fit Superman into his life like another task, another part of life. Family, friends, work. 

Her phone beeps next to her, and Kara reaches for it, looking at it.

**Lena Luthor**  
 **3 New Messages**

A lump forms in her throat at the sight of Lena’s name. She wants to read them, wants to answer her, but she can’t. Because Kara Danvers having such an intricate life was a mistake. Kara Zor-El was who she was. Supergirl was who she was meant to be. Kara Danvers was just a disguise, some form of protection. Thinking she could have it all had been her mistake. The whole fiasco with Daxam had proved that, proved that she couldn’t have both. She didn’t get to be human. Her parents had not sent her three thousand light years to fall in love, have children, or a white picket fence. She was here to protect. She was Kara Zor-El. She was the last daughter of Krypton. She was Supergirl.

From now on, all Kara Danvers would be was a disguise.

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think...and sorry for the angst, but this is a set up!


End file.
